Weakness On The Ranch

The Boys — Tue, 27 Jul 2010 21:34:27 +0000

Jim & Chris talk about addressing weaknesses in the organization. Good thing they don’t have any weaknesses themselves. Ahem… Tongue twisters, big sticks, inertia, limited partners: where else can you have this much fun with two guys in suits for free?

Watch for the viewer challenge in the first few minutes and the parting shot at the end. Extra credit if you catch Jim’s self-deprecating joke that zings right past Chris, like a losing volley in a gunfight. Don’t be ignorant and arrogant or, like Chris, you might miss something important as you revel in past glories. Solipsism can sneak up on you, so pay attention and mind the gap!

About suffering they were never wrong,
The Old Masters; how well, they understood
Its human position; how it takes place
While someone else is eating or opening a window or just walking dully along;
How, when the aged are reverently, passionately waiting
For the miraculous birth, there always must be
Children who did not specially want it to happen, skating
On a pond at the edge of the wood:
They never forgot
That even the dreadful martyrdom must run its course
Anyhow in a corner, some untidy spot
Where the dogs go on with their doggy life and the torturer’s horse
Scratches its innocent behind on a tree.
In Breughel’s Icarus, for instance: how everything turns away
Quite leisurely from the disaster; the ploughman may
Have heard the splash, the forsaken cry,
But for him it was not an important failure; the sun shone
As it had to on the white legs disappearing into the green
Water; and the expensive delicate ship that must have seen
Something amazing, a boy falling out of the sky,
had somewhere to get to and sailed calmly on.

WH Auden, 1938

Flying High (Planes Part 2)

The Boys — Sat, 26 Jun 2010 15:12:28 +0000

The boys are delighted to welcome back David Norton to continue the discussion of company planes. As they recline comfortably in the new Hat & Cattle G5, eating bonbons and sipping cocktails, David and the boys chat about the smart way to buy an airplane.

David Norton is Partner and Head of the Aviation Practice at Shackelford Melton & McKinley, a law firm based in Dallas. One of the of the foremost aviation attorneys in the U.S., David is a graduate of the U.S. Air Force Academy, a former Air Force pilot, and an active private pilot. He serves in a leadership role in various industry organizations, including as Chair of the Aviation Section of the State Bar of Texas and Chair of the National Business Aviation Association’s Domestic Operations Committee. Find out more about David and his firm here and at shacklaw.net. Thanks, David!

And as an aside, Jim’s broker keeps telling him that he’ll rival Gates, Buffet and Slim at the top of the Forbes list when pigs fly. Tune in to find out the real source of Jim’s interest in private jet travel. And watch until the end for the Parting Shot!

So You Want An Airplane

The Boys — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 03:10:10 +0000

Cattle car or G5? In search of an answer, the boys ride their trusty steeds into a discussion of time machines and jet planes as they contemplate the purchase of a private jet to augment their fleet of quarter horses. “When pigs fly!” you might say, but who would’ve thought they could rope another guest into joining them on the show.

As for Lefty, our one-eyed cameraman, the boys have had a talk with him, and he has promised to try to keep everyone in the middle of the trail in the future.

Good Ranching

The Boys — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 18:33:41 +0000

It’s like watching paint slowly disintegrate on cars in the parking lot. Naw, it’s not that bad, and it is good for you.

Responsibility is a big word for simple cowboys, but that’s what it’s about. When you play with a stick horse (like our guest, Pinto, from another program), you can act like a six-year old. Indeed everyone expects it. When you play with real horses, though, it’s time to act like a big boy. And that means thinking ahead, reviewing the impact of your actions on others, and taking responsibility. Id is not it.

Join the boys as they exercise their superegos to exorcise corporate demons and wrestle free market wraiths. If the boys can keep their bucking ids saddled and their outsized egos harnessed, well, any fool’s gotta be able to do it. Hat & Cattle superegos to the rescue! Oops, was that a Freudian slip or just some loose linguistic gravel?

Cowboy Oratory

The Boys — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 02:33:17 +0000

In case you hadn’t noticed, Jim & Chris like to talk. Well, in this meta-communicative communiqué, they expound upon excoriations and attempt to elucidate the art of explication. For those of you less rhetorically inclined, think of it as an extemporaneous exposé of oral expatiation. Aw heck, before you go and excommunicate them from your lives forever, just tune in to watch the boys jaw-jaw about jib-jab.

Plus, Jim mysteriously invokes his namesake, Jimmy Hoffa, while discussing the fear of being seen in public. Can you say “Witness Protection Program?” You never know what people are keeping under their cowboy hats.

Now, don’t forget about the Parting Shot at the end. And if you get the butterflies when giving a speech, just picture your audience wearing cowboy hats and nothing else.

Falling Off Your Horse

The Boys — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 02:29:28 +0000

The cattle are all gone. Horses too. They took our boots, hats, guns, spurs, and shiny belt buckles. Dang rustlers!

Our heroes nurse their wounds and walk painfully to the nearest town. With the last of their money (Jim stashed it you don’t want to know where), the boys drown their sorrows at the local watering hole. Hours later, after a night of drinking and gambling, they stumble out of the saloon and fall into the gutter. Before passing out, they raise their fists and fill the air with their drunken shouts: “Darn you synthetic CDO traders! Dag-nab animal spirits!”

Did the recession knock you off your horse? Join the boys as they discuss setbacks and starting fresh.

If you want a bit more of this sort of thing, check out: tiny.cc/ovjb3

Restructuring Part 3: Recaps

The Boys — Sat, 22 May 2010 16:34:25 +0000

When Chris and Jim leap off a racing horse to wrestle a steer to the ground, they don’t let go of that steer for anything. Similarly, when they manage to lasso a guest with an interesting and topical subject, they hold on for dear life.

Bernie Carrico, Senior Managing Director at White Rock Advisors (whiterockadvisors.com) returns to the show to conclude the discussion of debt-driven restructurings. Bernie advocates being a smart negotiator even in tough times. But the boys weren’t born yesterday: they recognize this as an attempt to negotiate for his freedom. Nice try Bernie!

Aw shucks, but he was awful nice to chat with us for so long. Maybe we will let him go – thanks Bernie! And watch to the end for our parting shot…

Latin Roping

The Boys — Fri, 21 May 2010 01:21:31 +0000

The boys manage to rope another guest into appearing on the show. It’s amazing what a toothy grin and a six-shooter can do to compel cooperation. Harvard political scientist Joseph Nye probably would tip his cowboy hat in agreement and say: “La poder inteligente es la más eficaz.”

Javier Mazón is Founder and President of Grupo Lamerica, LLC, a consulting firm that specializes in helping companies do business in Latin America and the Caribbean. ¡Bienvenido!

Javier and the boys grapple with getting things right in Latin America. Or as Jim likes to think of it: Ropin’ – Latin style!

Ranchos Extranjeros

The Boys — Thu, 06 May 2010 01:19:35 +0000

Chris & Jim continue their discussion with Javier Mazón in this episode. But wait, why are they all talkin’ funny?

En este programa, Chris, Jim y su huésped, Javier Mazón, discuten los beneficios y dificultades en una expansión internacional. Javier es el Fundador y Presidente de Grupo Lamerica, LLC (grouplamerica.com), una empresa consultoria enfocada en ayudando empresas con negocios entre Latinoamérica, el Caribe y el resto del mundo. ¡Bienvenido!

Por su parte, Jim sólo piensa (siguiendo las palabras del revolucionario mexicano, Pancho Villa) “No permitas que esto acabe así. Cuentales que he dicho algo.”

Jim’s final words? Well, he invokes the Mexican revolutionary, Pancho Villa, and says off camera: “Don’t let it end like this. Tell them I said something.” Fine, Jim, you said something. ¡Dijiste algo! ¡Ándale!

And stay tuned until the end for our new “Parting Shot.”

Young Buckaroos

The Boys — Thu, 29 Apr 2010 01:22:07 +0000

Little Buckaroos can have fun too! In this second part of their series on age, our heroes stop by the river of life with hopes of stirring up some golden nuggets of wisdom. You always knew they were just a couple of panhandlers…

The first part of the series was on “Wise Warriors”, but this time the boys turn their steely gazes upon “Young Bucks”: those plucky, but naïve cowpokes who always show up at the beginning of a cattle drive. Are you a young buck? Were you? Do you have to manage one? Have you played a practical joke on one? (The boys suggest surreptitiously loosening a saddle or innovative applications of hot chile peppers.) More tips are in store; so, settle in with the boys next to the roaring campfire.